Several days ago I said I would cover several things about my time in New York, including ants in my pants. Well, turns out someone beat me to it. This someone is Laurence Vickers, a fullback for the Dallas Cowboys.
On June 6th, according to CBS News, this happened,:
Vickers had to leave practice Wednesday when fire ants invaded his pants. The fullback discovered about four months ago that he was allergic to fire ants, so the sudden pain below his waste was a brief cause of panic, reports the Dallas Morning News.
“Fire ants got in my pants,” Vickers told the News. “I was freaking out. Oh, ants!”
Vickers further explains his feelings:
“I wanted to pull my pants down and run inside, but I couldn’t do that. When those ants get close to those testicles, there ain’t no laughing about that.”
I’m not sure there ain’t no laughing about that. Also, I was surprised to discover that Vickers’ middle name is, in fact, Blanchard. Combined with the fact that there exists a Ben Blanchard who reports from Beijing on Chinese news and politics for Reuters, I have decided that I must be destined for Chinese ants.